POLITICAL VILLAGE SQUARE: Mousetrap Budgets

0
407

BLOG BY NOONLIGHT (yet another duel at high noon)

My ‘guns’ are raised to another shot of political combat at high noon. And my intention is far less to present a toast to Smith and Wesson or Mr Kalashnikov (as worthy of a high toast as they may be) than to invite you, dear reader, to soar across high noon with us. Yes as you know, new editions of this blog are posted everyday (or every other day) exactly at 12noon (or thereabout) so stay with us and please don’t click that link. Why “every other day” and “thereabout”? Because we, on this blog, have pledged to follow muse of 2019 and how she intends to deal out the aces buried in a full stack of power (which of course affects when and what time editions of this blog will go up).

I just made the following post on Facebook:

“I stand to be educated (or should I say I sit to be educated) to what percentage implementation of the 2017 budget was achieved by the current administration. Yeah yeah I know I can ask Google but I could use a human touch too. Somebody please lecture me. I’m dying for some instruction.”

Lets see what kind of comments I get from that post. Especially from the die hard Sai Baba apostles. Dont worry I will be coming right back at you with the reactions and comments against the above quoted Facebook post which I made just a few minutes ago. Oh and by the way, I’m reminded of another social media post related to wise use of public resources. We can deal with that in the next section of this blog tagged Today’s Focus.

TODAY’S FOCUS

Speaking of expenditures out of the 2017 budget, we might as well, through another social media post, recall what happened some time ago when there was a bit of an uproar about huge sums of money earmarked for renovation of the Nigerian President’s office due to damage caused by rats. Yes it was one Twitter user @MandyChisholm who wrote:

“It is possible for rat to destroy Buhari’s office, I kid you not, Nigerian rats are bloody. I remember the group of rats that ate my mattress, drank my bottle of olive oil, ate the whole bottle and everything else in site but not the rat poison. So imagine what political rats can do…”

Now that was very funny though many other Nigerians did not find it funny that N200m was to be spent for eradication of rat in the president’s office. I remember that on Facebook, a prominent British Nigerian had said that even though “our MuMu don increase,”(no be small increment my brother), Nigerians still know market prices ooo.” He further went on to provide a price list for rat poison and other means of tackling rat infestation:

Rat bomb: N100

Kill and Dry: N200

Rat Bible: N350

Otapiapia: N400

2 Wild Ajaokuta pussycat, Male and Female: N500 (at Wuse Market)

By the way our British Nigerian brother who maintains very close links with home scene and visits home every other year, also disclosed that the two wild Ajaokuta pussycats are guaranteed to deal with all rats within 24hrs of lodging them in-house or your money back. I will be getting back to him about mousetraps too of which I know there are many (including the catch and release variety).

Back then, Senior Special Assistant to the president explained that Buhari has a well equipped office at home and would work from there until the ‘bloody coup’ against rats is completely carried out.

Mousetrap budgeting is budgeting that fails to encourage voluntary tax compliance which makes even more cash available for dealing with national problems (which in turn indicates the continuation of business-as-usual). On that note, we ask whether 2017 budget was yet another mousetrap budget? Talk to us in comments. Feel free to lecture us too. How much voluntary tax compliance was encouraged by government implemented the 2017 budget?

REMNANTS FOR 2019

The content to be published in this segment of Political Monitor will comprise video interviews of special sons and daughters of the soil who will share methods for freeing Nigeria from the Mouse Trap Budgeting of the past several decades. Nigerians are thoroughly fed up with come-and-chop, business as usual politicians and have in fact lost complete faith in the political class. But no matter how bad things may be, THERE IS ALWAYS A REMNANT. And besides, too sharp a break from the past may not be the way to go. Just like a chain smoker who wants to stop smoking is more likely to succeed if he proceeds gradually, so too may we need ‘come-and-chop-small’ politicians rather than the all out, no holds barred come-and-chop culture. Indeed too much water has passed beneath the bridge and too much blood has seeped into the soil. So we hope to be talking to remnants who will not cause long dead Nigerian freedom fighters and patriots to turn in their graves. But most importantly (in fact far more importantly), the public officers to be promoted on this blog as Political Remnants For 2019, should not eventually spark the wrath of the masses and cause God to speak to them in His deep displeasure.

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here